Into the silence..........

For God alone my soul waits in silence,

for my hope is from him.

He alone is my rock and my salvation,

my fortress; I shall not be shaken.

On God rests my deliverance and my honor;

my mighty rock, my refuge is in God.

Trust in him at all times, O people;

pour out your heart before him

God is a refuge for us. 

   Ps62.5-8

My private prayer life (in contrast to my professional prayer life which requires a more public articulation of our approach to God) has reached a place where I rarely speak words aloud.  Most times I am forming words in my mind.....although rarely complete sentences......just images, phrases, single words.  

I have experienced a time when silence was the most I could manage.  I had no words.  There were no images.  Sentences had been lost days and weeks and months before.  I did not seek this time of silence; it wasn't a meditation practice.  It was a time when time stood still, breath was elusive, the future was no more than a blank void.

I was beyond participating in my future: time had simply stopped and I knew the futility of my feeble attempts to shape tomorrow.  I stood absolutely still, frozen in the cross hairs of life and at most I prayed that the Spirit was praying for me.  Remember the story of Elijah in the cave waiting for God who came not in the wind or the earthquake or the fire but in the sheer sound of silence (occasionally translated 'a still small voice').  I waited in the silence for an encounter with God.

This psalm brought me back to those times when I learned a little bit more about waiting on God and trusting in the Creator to hold me close.  For me the psalmist has captured the intersection of the cross......where this world and God's eternity are bound together, a moment when we stand in the silence and await our God.

It was a terrible time when God came close and called me deeper into a life of trust.  I would never choose it voluntarily; I would not be who I am without it.  

Who is worthy today?

I ask this question because it shapes our lives together.  Who is worthy of God's love and forgiveness today, Monday, June 13th?  Who is worthy to take their place in our society without oppression? without harrassment?  without fear?  Even when we disagree with them, who is worthy to take their place as a brother or sister in our shared humanity?

We need to wrestle with this question.  Do we count some folks as 'less than' us?  Although we might not go out and oppress these individuals, are we silent when others do?  Is there a place in our hearts where we really aren't terribly surprised or upset that these people get the wrong end of the stick?  Do we tsk-tsk over violent acts that rob them of health, peace and sometimes their own lives?

When we look askance on another class of individuals - a group formed by their actions or beliefs or gender or race or religion - we are convincing ourselves that We are right. We are more worthy.

Sometimes we think we are more worthy because we have worked hard for our position and so obviously they have not.

Sometimes we think we are more worthy because they are strange, follow strange rituals, and make us feel uncomfortable.  Our comfort is the norm we follow.

Sometimes we think we are more worthy because 'they' could always act differently and keep themselves out of harm's way.  They need to make a greater effort to keep themselves safe.

Safe from us.  The ones who are more worthy.  We are more worthy because we have more money, the greater power, the right gender, the right skin color, the right Holy Days.

On a day like today, when 50 people were gunned down because they were different......because they were counted as 'not worthy'........because too many 'regular' folk will remain silent at their slaughter........our silence is deafening.

The story of the Pharisee and the woman who anoints Jesus cautions us about determining in our own hearts who is worthy of God's love and grace and life-giving forgiveness.  It embarrasses us with our cultural assumptions.  It cautions us about counting ourselves as more worthy than another. Luke 7.36ff.

And, please note:  it cautions us about holding these thoughts in our hearts even when we never speak them aloud.  Jesus knows.    

Today is a good day to wrestle with our hearts, our neighbors, and Jesus' call to love.  When we treat folks as if they have no value, we give permission for society to oppress them.  Our society.  Us.

Perhaps today is the day for our silence to end.  For who among us is truly worthy?

It's either ALL or its NONE.

Prayer: the sound of silence

Silence.

Sometimes expectant.

Sometimes hostile.

Very rare in 21st century America.

Often the most powerful moments of corporate worship are the all too short and infrequent silences.  Devoid of speaking or singing or moving, these times allow the Word of God to sink in, to find its way beyond our exterior into the places where we make decisions and form hopes.

Here is the classic story of the great silence:

The prophet Elijah had been a great champion for YHWH against the priests of Baal, a cult which competed with YHWH for the loyalty of the people.  Elijah had danced around the 450 prophets of Baal, taunting and criticizing.  In the end, YHWH demonstrated the power that resides with the Creator of the Universe and Elijah was vindicated.  All 450 prophets of Baal were put to death.  Then he had to run for his life. (1 Kings 18.20 - 19.18 This is such a grand story you might want to read it for yourself).

On Mount Horeb, when Elijah and God are about to meet, a great wind passed Elijah by, but God was not in the wind.  Then there was a great earthquake, and after the earthquake a fire, but God was not in either of those.

Then there was the sound of sheer silence.  That was where Elijah met God. 

 It is often where we meet God as well.  

Add silence to your spiritual life.  Seek that place of silence so profound that only God can fill it.  You will be blessed.